Los Porchs

For those of you who keep up with my Facebook, you probably noticed (just a little) that I am completely in love with my new cousin who arrived this morning at 10:10.  She's just so teeny tiny and every time I see a picture of her, I just want to squeeze her!  Gah! I can practically smell her new baby smell. I'm keeping this in mind as I attempt to "reduce the stress" in my life (they make it sound so easy, don't they?) Positive.  Vibes.  Only. Sometimes it's hard when I see birth announcements on Facebook but I gotta say -- seeing her sweet face today just made me burst with pride!  Her parents waited a very long time to meet her and I am 100% certain they will say she was worth the wait.  Just wait until I get my hands on her, oh, there will be pictures.  LOTS of pictures. I never thought I'd say this, but I'm so happy to be surrounded by new babies!  It's just so joyous! It makes my heart sing. xo

If you're looking for a way to feel totally overwhelmed and have a strong desire to burst into tears, might I suggest attempting to read 41 pages of insurance bologna about infertility treatment?  Suddenly, you're staring at blurry words painfully telling you what will and won't be covered and when it will be covered and up to what amount.  I won't lie, kids, I have no clue what the hell I was reading.  It was like reading something in Greek.  Upside down.  While drunk. I sincerely hope we can make sense of it all & that our amazing OB/GYN will help me understand what this all says. And seriously?  41 pages? I could really use a wish right now... xoxo

Okay, it's just one of the many reason I love him, but this is part of the email he sent me today after some conversation about being disappointed by how difficult our journey has been and continues to be: ... " It's frustrating that we need to jump through these hoops. Our kid had better be awesome, cause if they're douches, I'm going to feel ripped off. :) " I just giggled.  I couldn't hold it in.  He makes me laugh and that helps me to not feel sad or  overwhelmed    He's pretty fantastic.

When I was younger, I used to have this reoccurring dream where I was older (like the age I am now I guess) and randomly met a little girl and knew in that moment that she was my daughter.  That I had given birth to this child and she had been taken from me without my knowledge.  I'm pretty certain that no mother out there has ever given birth unknowingly, but that's the feeling in this dream every time.  That I know without hesitation just by looking at her (it's always a girl, around age 2) that she's mine.  She's part of me. A weird dream, for sure.  But today at brunch with a dear friend, I realized that this might have been me acknowledging adoption might be the way we add a tiny human to our family.  True, these dreams were occurring way before I was ready to have children, before I knew fertility was an issue, and certainly before I had even met Porch, but what a bizarre feeling.  I haven't had this dream in a while but just thought I'd put it out i

Did anyone else FREAK OUT when they saw this handsome devil show up this season as Joje n?! You know I love IMDB and was pretty darn proud of myself for recognizing it right away. That's all. I see he still has the same baby face. I just can't stop picturing him in Love Actually. =)

Had an appointment this afternoon with my OB/GYN and we had our usual conversation about the baby-making and our progress (though obviously, if I wasn't there for a pregnancy test or a prenatal visit, I'd think she'd know where I was in that journey) and something came up during the exam.  She suspects that I have a cyst on my ovary and I (hooray) am the winner of an ultrasound appointment to figure out what the heck is going on in there.  Of course, my biggest fear is the treatment of a potential cyst.  The fear of another "routine" surgery going awry because that's just my luck.  The ultrasound is scheduled for June.  Fingers are crossed. After that appointment, I fully expect to begin the IVF process.  That's such a hard thing for me to fathom or accept or really digest.  I'm thankful for the many friends who have gone through the process themselves and have been willing to share their stories.  Their stories make the idea a little less scary and

If you have a quick minute, this is hilarious, Game of Thrones-y, and worth the time to read.  :)

Our mothers! Porch and I are blessed to have three fabulous women we call "Mom." I love that about our family.  I had a funny exchange with a parent last night at pick up as she said, "Happy Mothers-- wait, you're not a mom. Never mind... Happy Not Being a Mom Day," before exiting stage right. I just kind of stood there for a minute processing what she had said and then laughed. Happy 8+ hours of sleep to ME! I have 23 (plus one on the way, whenever Baby J arrives to his family... Maybe this weekend!) kiddos that I get to spend my days with and 22 amazing families that I get to impact every single day! I may not get to take one home with me (legally) but those children are very much "mine." I have a downright amazing husband who cracks me up with such gems as "If a train leaves Milwaukee at 10:00 and is travelling at 80mph and a second train leaves Chicago at 7:00 at 45mph, how many hours are in the new season of Arrested Development?&qu

It's good to see this kid doesn't look like such a flippin' jerk in real life. I want to punch his real face much less than his GoT face. Stand proud.