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And so begins the crazy? What if we were crazy all along?

I like to be busy.  I'm talkin' crazy-making busy.  It forces me to get my shit together and use time management and maybe stop wasting so much time on Pinterest and Facebook (by the way, you guys need to update more frequently while I'm on vacation -- yawn) to accomplish something   And deadlines?  Ooooh, I live for deadlines.  I mastered the art of completing a 12-page paper due at midnight no earlier than 11pm.  Less room for second guessing.

Alas, I'm pretty sure those days of grad school are behind me as I prepare to begin this cohort at Erikson to earn my Infant Toddler Specialist certificate.  I suspect I won't have much time for a life between continuing to work my typical 50 hour week, going to school (and actually getting something from it), trying to make a tiny human, and finishing the NAEYC process.  What's that you ask?  What did I just say?  Finishing NAEYC?  Going to school?

Oh, that tiny human bit?  Ain't no thang.  We've just recently realized we need to get a little more serious about the process and hey, with me accepting this scholarship, it pretty much guarantees that we'll be successful smack dab in the middle of my coursework.  Karma is not a pretty thing in this house.  I once said something snarky to Porch and immediately shut my foot in the car door.  My payback is typically instantaneous.  Porch's tends to be in the long run so we're trying to mind our p's and q's and hope for some good juju around here.

All joking aside, I think part of the reason for my recent insomnia has been the realization that I'm about to embark on this crazy 2 year journey and our lives are about to get crazier.  Talking to Porch about Mondays/Wednesdays being his nights to shine w/ dinner as I won't get home until probably 9 made me realize just what we have in store for us.

And knowing our luck, our efforts will (hopefully) work out for us and I'll end up with-child sooner than we thought possible and I'll have to figure out how to finish this program with a baby on my hip and no child care.  What-what.  I'll just totally wear my baby to class and give the stink eye to anyone who judges.  Or perhaps we'll make it through the next two years without the blessing of a tiny human and at the end of the coursework, I'll stop and realize how badly I want to have a tiny human.  I don't know.

I hate not knowing.

I know that it's an adventure, but seriously, just once in my life, I'd like to know where I'm going before I get there.  I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up and (while I know that's okay) it terrifies me.

I need a vacation from my thoughts --- so excited to go back to work on Monday!!!!!
And that list of projects?  Pssssssht... yeah right.  I did a whole lot of nothing but hide from my stress and thoughts of "what if."  I need to get out of my head for a while.

xoxo
Mrs. Porch


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