Skip to main content

Unsolicited advice

I love the network of people we have built over the past few years and admire and respect those who are parents or like me, have a vast knowledge of child development and thus have a greater understand of developmentally appropriate practice and expectations for young children.  I know so many amazing parents and educators and I consider myself quite blessed, especially since I know they will be here to help me and answer my sleep-deprived questions after the baby arrives.

But let's be clear:  I also know some really shitty parents.... and some people who have no friggin' clue what the hell they're talking about, they just like the sound of their own voices, you know what I'm sayin'?  I will not be taking advice from those folks.  I will perhaps nod my head and thank them, because really, it would be grossly inappropriate for me to do much else, but deep in my heart, I know whose examples I wish to follow and whom I would rather never hear a word from about "how to raise this baby."

Unsolicited advice can roll both ways.  Sometimes it's unsolicited because we would never in a billion years ask that person for advice because seriously -- wtf do they know about anything and how do they even manage to dress themselves in the morning?  Sometimes it's unsolicited because we never thought to ask that person for advice.  I have given my share of unsolicited advice and resources over the course of my 30 years, especially as I gain more knowledge and understanding of early childhood education and infant/toddler development.

I'm not an expert on parenting and honestly, I don't think such a thing will ever exist.  Each kid is different (ask any mom with more than one child) and each parent experiences the art of parenting in the context of their own situations.  I consider myself an almost-expert on child development.  We'll never know everything because you can't understand each person's context or soul.

I'm ready to throw everything I know out the window when our daughter arrives, but this is only because I know I have a network of experienced, educated people to support us.  We're more of a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants people anyway.

xoxo

Comments

  1. I gave people the opportunity to offer me unsolicited advice at my babyshower so they should get it out of their system. Yeah, that didn't work! So my advice to you is.... ;)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It is not 1950; I do not vacuum in pearls.

Hi, it's me - I know it's been a while, but I've been deep inside that bubble I mentioned when everything first happened in November 2020 and I am starting to emerge having done some serious healing and navigating within the trauma of being a suicide survivor and a sole parent. This has nothing to do with that though. I'm dumping this thought here because I need it documented: You know how the conservative crowd tends to use "Well I don't have any children, why should I help pay for the schools?" and "People are just too lazy to work, I don't know why we need social services to help people pay for their child care and food?" I'm noticing those are the same voices I hear in restaurants complaining that there are no servers. No bartenders. No one available to change their oil or to do other trade work. And no one to watch their children.  The CEO of the company I work for posted a big response about how child care is the gatekeeper to folks...

Momma K

It's true.  I love my mom.  She's my best source of advice & wisdom, even though it took me roughly 20 years to figure that out.  I just wanted to take a quick second and thank her for all that she's done for me and especially for the things she didn't do for me.  =)  I wouldn't be the person I am today without her. Love you mom! We're pretty fabulous, no?

That time we sold our house.

Porch, Charlotte, and I are excited to share that we are moving!  If you follow us on Facebook, you know that we put our house up for sale on Thursday.  By Saturday afternoon, we had 3 offers on the table and we accepted!  I can't even begin to express our shock, our joy, our excitement, and our nervousness about the months ahead. We put an offer on a house closer to my new job as Charlie attends the center and being closer means that Porch can drop her off on my early shift (6am-3pm) and pick her up on my late shift (9:30-6:30pm) so Charlie isn't spending all of her waking hours in child care.  We're ridiculously excited, yet cautious. The new house has 4 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms and is begging for a series of updates.  There are a number of projects that await us but we're so excited to call this new place home and to make it into something that's truly ours.  A home we can grow into.  A home we can share with our family over the years and create ...