Los Porchs

Merry Christmas little one!  Today we told your great grandparents about you!  The news of your conception & growth brought tears to Great Grandma Kempowski's eyes and made Great Grandpa Kempowski so very happy.  Great Grandma Niermann seemed to know you were coming and said, "I'm so pleased.  I prayed you would have a child."  Words cannot tell you how much you are already loved and how long we've all been praying for you.  It was hard to keep faith at times, but I always knew that someday, you would find us.  We are meant to be your parents and you are destined to be in our family.  Keep growing strong!  You'll have lots of playmates waiting for you at future family gatherings!  It's a boom!  You make me so happy, just knowing that you're here, growing and changing within me. How far along?  7 weeks Total weight gain:  3.5 -- but to be fair, I've had no morning sickness (knock on wood) and just survived the holidays & all the trea

Nugget,   As far as I know, you're in there growing according to plan!  You're about the size of a pea and your brain has developed and even though your heart is just the size of a poppy seed, it's pumping blood to your body!  It's so amazing to think that someone so small could have such incredible things going on!  You've been so busy growing & I cannot wait (am.freaking.out) to see you on Friday.  I feel like I've been holding my breath, just waiting to see a glimpse of you and our future and your daddy does a pretty good job of keeping me calm (as much as he can).  Once I see you and can hear that wonderful heart of yours, I will feel more confident and suspect I'll feel more excited and giddy.  I wonder about you and how you will change our lives and I giggle when I picture your daddy encountering the wild and crazy things you'll do... :)  Keep growing, little nugget, we can't wait to see all of the hard work you've been doing in there!

My darling nugget, The days pass slowly but time is sailing by; I can't believe we're at 5 weeks today.  We're getting ready to make the announcement to your grandmas & grandpas that you're on your way next summer and think we've found a great way to do it!  Momma loves Todd Parr (children's author & illustrator, you'll know) and found The Grandma Book and The Grandpa Book to share with them!  The inside cover where it says, "This book belongs to..." has "Baby Niermann, Arriving August 2014" written inside.  You'll have books to read at their houses before you're even born.  I apologize in advance for the abundance of books you'll read.  Your momma and daddy are bookworms and I can already envision us reading to you.  You'll be a genius!  ;)  I am so excited to see you next week & to see Grandma & Grandpa Kempowski's reaction when we tell them!  It's been SO hard not to tell them about you yet bu

Dear Nugget, You're nestled into my lining and making yourself comfortable.  Your daddy and I would much appreciate if you stayed with us; we are so eager to meet you and to begin this journey with you.  I still can't believe that our first IVF cycle worked.  I had my first blood test on Thursday and Vernita called to tell me that I am "SO pregnant."  You are the answer to a much repeated, much desired prayer.  I can't feel you yet, but just knowing that you're there and that you're mine makes me so incredibly happy.  We haven't told your grandparents yet; we're waiting for the right time -- and a new picture of you to share!  I have another blood test on Monday and if that's okay, we'll get to see you the following week!  I am on pins and needles (thankfully no more injections) waiting to hear your heart beat.  I just want to know you're safe and happy in your momma.  I'm so eager to see you, hear you, feel you, touch you, all t

Last year was the first year that Porch and I sent out Christmas cards we had made on Snapfish.  They were cute and made me happy.  So it made sense that this year, we'd do the same!  No problem!  I logged in and got to work, found a cute design, etc, etc, etc... and then I had to choose the picture.  And here is where we find the problem.  There are no "good" pictures of Porch & I from this year that I could readily find.  I say readily because I wanted to get this order placed so I could 1. benefit from the 55% off sale and 2. be done with this project because I have about a billion other things going on right now with work, school, and the holidays. Rest assured, I finally found 1 picture that got Porch's approval.  So the cards have been ordered and we're ready to rock!  Now I just need to get over to Costco to purchase 40+ stamps so I can mail these cards out when they arrive! Does your family send out Christmas/holiday cards?  Why or why not? '

I'll admit it.  While I love, love, love the feelings surrounding Thanksgiving and the food, I am waaaay more into the decorations for Christmas.  I'm not sure why that it; are there just no cute Thanksgiving decor options?!  That cannot be true... I went on a hunt and here's what I found!  But who are we kidding -- I'm still jonesin' to set up that tree!  The only thing holdin' me back is that we're hosting Thanksgiving here! Thanksgiving Decor by mrsniermann featuring handmade home decor Coir mat williams-sonoma.com Fall Colors Mug Stack with Metal Stand kirklands.com Tag pumpkin soup tureen allmodern.com Sur La Table turkey salt and pepper shaker surlatable.com Shea s Wildflower rustic home decor nordstrom.com Tag home decor allmodern.com Simon Pearce fall home decor bloomingdales.com Handmade home decor horchow.com

Porch has a great new(ish) hobby.  He's been brewing beer!  The latest batch was a robust porter and I am still giggling at the name:  I'm So Confused.  The label is even funnier.  I just had to share it because every now and then, we just need a good laugh.  :)

We made beef fajitas in the Crock Pot tonight and as I sit in the cozy recliner I inherited from my grandpa, I feel so warm. So cozy. So blessed. Call it a food coma. I love these moments of reflection. We are so fortunate to have each other and to be on this crazy adventure together. I really try to keep these moments tucked away for the rainy days. What are you feeling cozy and blessed with today?

For reals... my newest addiction is watching videotaped reactions as people tell their families they are expecting.  It's like this moment of happiness, even though I have no clue who some any of these people are, I get to be excited and overwhelmed by their happiness and joy for a quick moment.  It's a high, I won't lie. Here are a few that I've enjoyed on YouTube. This video went viral and I think we've ALL heard her ridiculousness. Honestly, if  my mom doesn't respond this way to the news (when it comes, slow down people, don't go jumping to conclusions just yet) I'm going to feel a little let down.  I mean, this woman flopped around on her couch like a fish.  That's love something! I sincerely hope my father doesn't ask me "How did you do that?" if/when we announce a pregnancy (seriously, don't be starting a rumor mill).  I'm hopeful that people get the gist of where babies come from, at least the a

I think things just taste better when you make them from scratch.  That's not (by any means) to suggest that items like Dutch apple pie from Jewel-Osco isn't amazeballs after a long day.  It's simply to say that a homemade pie brings a sense of satisfaction.  I suspect that's how people feel about their children.  "I made that."  Except when said child is naughty, in which case I'm guessing it's more of a, "My husband made that." I digress. We made black bean & corn chicken in the Crock Pot today and wanted to add something special as this was a freezer meal that took minimal (I cannot tell you enough how much I love freezer meals) effort.  Porch had to buy corn flour the other day for a recipe and I suggested we make tortillas with it.  And so, we did. And it was good. And easy.  And delicious.  And will be repeated.  For as easy as it was, it added a special touch to our meal. What did you make for dinner tonight? xoxo

So sitting down and eating half a bag of popcorn was a.... good decision? I only partially regret it. @PopcornPalace #cookiesanddream — Danielle Lynn (@MsDanL83) November 13, 2013 So I did my good deed and bought popcorn when our center did a fundraiser with Popcorn Palace this fall. Super proud of our families who raised an amazing profit!  I brought home a few bags of interesting flavors and here's the best part -- sat my butt on the couch with the bag of Cookies & Dream (seriously?) and proceeded to eat half the bag without batting an eye.  SERIOUSLY.  Putting whole Oreo's in there?  I should invest in a treadmill to deal with the calories I just inhaled. Because there's no way I'll be able to stop eating this isht. And I seriously hope Porch didn't want any of this; I've offered exactly none and there's now none left to offer so....... xoxo

Even when things are shitty as hell, it's really important for me to pause and reflect and to truly give thanks for the good things in our life.  It's not always easy and sometimes it's as simple as giving thanks for the cup of coffee at the end of the work day.  Every year, I attempt to give thanks on a daily basis on the blog (see last year's here and this year's here ). Found this on Etsy and am brainstorming a cute way to use it :) You can find it here . I hope that you too will feel inspired to reflect and give thanks for the good things in your life. Peace!

I apologize.  For some of my blogger friends, I have a confession:  I stalk your life.  I mean it.  Not in a creepy kind of way, but in the "please update your blog more frequently so I can learn more about your story progression" kind of way.  Is that wrong?  I have vested interest in your story and eagerly await updates on the daily.  So.... get on that.  Because I'm living vicariously through some of ya'll. xoxo Mrs. Porch

Okay so when I think about the fact that it's now November and we finally caved in and saw an RE for the first time in July, it's easy to feel disappointed.  And then I remember that Dr. TK didn't come into our lives until September (after a long dance, not the first (nor the last) with the insurance company).  We're making progress and are forming a concrete plan for the future of Los Porchs and the addition of an embryo.  Yes.  An embryo.  This is science my darlings, not simply something one prays for and waits around for... [so kindly keep the "God has a greater plan for you" comments to a minimum, I am totally overwhelmed by them and tend to take them with a spirit of hostility rather than the graciousness you intend; I hope to get over that someday].

An approval code never looked so damn good!  Vernita called today to share the good news!  We're going to Green Bay this weekend for the Packers vs. Bears game and I will need to call the office on Monday for our next steps, appointment dates, and prescription information! Oh my goodness!  It's happening!  It's so easy to look back to when we finally admitted to ourselves that weened an RE and had our first appointment in Glenview.  I remember already being anxious about the time and gas that it would require.  That was July.  Today marks the beginning of November and we have only been with Dr. TK since September so really, things have moved relatively quickly since we found Dr. TK.  We are having conversations about freezing embryos.  We have pretty much agreed not to tell anyone when we are in the midst of our first (and hopefully only) IVF cycle.  The pressure to report and share seems too much, especially if we are unsuccessful.  We have agreed, however, to share news o

As I sat in the toddler classroom at work today, rocking an almost-two-year-old nugget to sleep while listening to the rain falling on the roof and looking at the gorgeous fall colors in our centers backyard, I couldn't help but think about the changing of the seasons, and how things fall apart to come back together.  The leaves predictably change color and float down every fall and start anew in the spring.  This mirrors our lives and how I am working to let the sorrow fall... in hopes that something new will find me in the coming season.  I lean on hope and optimism and have to remind myself that it's okay to have hope.  It's okay to be excited.  We are moving forward, even if we are taking the smallest of baby steps known to mankind (seriously). I take comfort in knowing this is our life.  We're in this together.  And there's every possibility that by the time we're watching the leaves fall and getting excited about the holidays next year, we may have a tin

Our insurance company is currently backlogged and is trying to get caught up as soon as possible to approve our treatment plan and options.  I love that there's never a delay in billing, just in approvals.  Because when they want something, I should drop everything and give them all of my money.  But when we need something.... hurry up and wait.  And then call back.  And wait. So I have nothing to report at this point in my life and am anxiously awaiting any contact from the insurance folks. xoxo, Mrs. Porch

I may have to get over my fear of my sewing machine as well as my tendency to leave half-finished shit everywhere.   We just accepted a $20 Christmas challenge; we're only going to spend $20 on each person when we celebrate our Richmond Christmas.  Plane tickets have been purchased and we are super excited to spend some time with Porch's mom and sister. The $20 Christmas Challenge: Spend no more than $20 on a gift Must be air-travel friendly OMG.  I just realized what I agreed to & feel the compulsive need to get on Pinterest and find something acceptable to create between now and December. Wish me luck! xoxo,

Listen up everyone, I seriously had to talk myself down this past week.  I almost packed up everything (including Porch) and moved to Toronto.  No joke.  We got back on Monday afternoon and on the train ride to class, I was already looking online for jobs and housing and trying to figure out how to become a resident.  That's how much I loved the experience.  And the people.  Especially the people. Jellyfish at Ripley's Aquarium, Toronto, ON Jellyfish at Ripley's Aquarium, Toronto, ON The Dangerous Lagoon at Ripley's Aquarium, Toronto, ON Stingray at Ripley's Aquarium, Toronto, ON A skyline to love (Toronto, ON) I took all of these photos myself.  I can't thank Porch & my parents enough for the awesome camera they bought me last year for my birthday!  I'm getting such great shots and love it!  Thank you!! From the moment we landed on Friday, there was just something different about being in Canada.  And it really exceeded the &qu

Don't panic.  That's so far.... okay, it's really not. Kind of crazy, right?  Halloween isn't even here yet and I already have Christmas on the brain.  I always feel like I shortchange Thanksgiving.  Knowing this about myself, we decided to host Thanksgiving at our home this year and we are super excited about it!  My mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and my parents are joining us so we'll have an intimate group size of 6 and lots of yummy food and drink options (I've been pinning away with great ideas -- see them all here & follow me on Pinterest!).  We're busy planning and considering how we'll accommodate the 6 of us for dinner and football -- PACK ATTACK! -- and most importantly, how to prepare this bird. Initial thoughts were to grill the turkey; have any of you ever done this?  We have a charcoal grill now so I'm not sure how well this would play out, but we're nothing if not adventurous!  And the side dishes, oh the side dishes!  We&#

We met with Dr. TK this week & are excited, anxious, scared, all at once.  I am back on birth control for the first time since before my surgery.  We are hoping to start injections by the end of October (OMG, there really isn't much left of October) or early November.  Given our plans to travel around the holidays, I asked Dr. TK what he thought about us being away for a few days and he simply stared at me and said, "By December, we'll know if you are pregnant."  Ha.  I almost fell off my chair.  There it is again, that feeling of hope!  Ryan and I are having serious conversations about who to tell and when to tell. I am jumping up and down at the notion of possibly being pregnant by Christmas.  I believe with the help of Dr. TK we can actually make this happen!  And even if it doesn't happen the first time, it's so ridiculously exciting to have hope in our lives again.  The news about our odds wasn't very good and our chances of conceiving naturally a

My, time certainly does slip away from us, doesn't it?  We've been busy busy for the entire month of October and there doesn't appear to be any signs of a slow down until later this month.  We spent this past weekend in Wisconsin for the wedding of one of my dearest friends, KT and her new hubby.  It was so nice to be able to see them & how genuinely happy they are together -- and how relaxed they both seemed throughout the day. Next weekend, we will be celebrating another dear friend's wedding in Canada!  I'm so excited; we're flying out on Friday morning so we have some time to play in Toronto.  We're open to your suggestions about things to do/see/try while we're there... (ketchup chips are amazeballs).  We gave ourselves an extra day so we could travel to Niagara Falls as well.  I've been there once with my family, but it was such a breathtaking view that I am eager to return.  I would loved to honeymoon there, but a minimoon with Porch wil

Sometimes we have to take things into our own hands. After many attempts to reach Dr. TK's office and figure out our next steps, I called again today and am so thankful I did!  They are going to start pre-certification of our IVF round & medications.  I will go in on CD3 (cycle day 3) for another ultrasound and blood work... and when we meet with Dr. TK, we will learn more about our treatment plan.  As of now, it seems we may be able to start this month if all goes well with the approval process.   I know when I called the fertility department, the people were super sweet to me, so I'm hopeful that all will go smoothly and that by Christmas, we have something to celebrate.  I so badly want to be pregnant for the holidays!  It's always something I've wished for & maybe, just maybe, this year is our year! xoxo

Don't you kind of want Porch to contribute to this blog too?  I know I do!  Maybe if enough people start asking him about it (hint, hint, wink, wink, nudge, nudge), he'll take that first leap! He knows lots of stuff about lots of stuff!  He's my favorite nerd. xoxo

To everyone who told me I would come to love running and crave it, I'm kinda sorry I laughed in your faces.  On my way home from work, I was feeling anxious and fidgety and like I had some extra (seriously, how?) energy that needed to be dealt with pronto.  I came home and putzed around, avoided homework, the usual... and then decided to lace up the old (they're new, it's an expression, work with me) running shoes and hit the track even though it's my night "off" from running.  Porch's only request?  Make sure I'm ready to run with him tomorrow.  This running business is growing on me, even if I move slowly, because I've come to associate it with good sleep, less anxiety, and most importantly, time with Porch.  When the snow gets here, we're going to have to think of ways to stay in shape (let's call it maintaining at best) since the track will be covered with snow and is typically a mud hole until late spring. All my Chicago friends, te

I saw this online the other day and at first, thought how appropriate it is for what Porch & I have been attempting lately (lots of running) but after some deeper thought and revisiting, I've come to think of this as being more fitting for our story on the road to making a tiny human. I think it's appropriate, meaningful, and inspirational all at once.  A great reminder that no matter how slow we move, how many baby steps (no pun intended) we take, as long as we keep moving forward, it's better than giving up in frustration.  I once had a colleague tell me that it was only important that we "keep moving forward, no matter what."  That mantra has stuck with me for years and I've come to apply it personally and professionally.  It's okay that this is taking time.  It's our story and it will never be the same as anyone else's story. Likewise, I am not a runner.  I honestly don't even know why I started running, but damn it.  It feels so

My HSG was completed on the 24th downtown at the surgery center.  We found out that my Fallopian tubes are not blocked but Dr. TK thinks there is likely some scar tissue that's causing issues.  Ryan goes for his bloodwork and analysis (this will be lucky number 3) tomorrow.  Hopefully, once we have the full picture of what's going on in our bodies, we can make a plan and move forward.  Tomorrow is my 30th birthday and right now, I'm feeling pretty apathetic about it.  I thought it would be a bigger deal, but really nothing yet.  Lots of feelings of nostalgia on my way tow ork this morning.  I can't believe I'm going to be 30.  And I can't believe I still don't have children.  Meanwhile, many friends are done and have older children, but they aren't me.  I get that now.  Sometimes, I just feel stuck.  Like I"m living the same day over and over.  I'm hopeful that there are good things to come because I'm stressed out. xoxo

I think leakage is one of my least favorite words.  It's just so... gross.  I made it through my entire grueling day and came out on the other side.  Not only did I survive NAEYC and my HSG, but I also hauled my happy ass to the track for a run.  What amazes me is when I tell myself it's okay if it's not my best and that I'm just happy that I managed to get myself there and somehow manage to have a personal best!  I'm not a runner.  I run.  Sometimes.  I just never expected to be excited about it or to want to beat my own time, though looking back, I'm not surprised.  I love numbers and data and being able to see my growth over time. Anyway, the HSG was interesting.  I have a great doctor, Dr. TK, who has a fantastic sense of humor; that is to say he cracks himself up every 10 minutes with a one-liner that no one else laughs at -- I find I'm typically laughing at his ability to crack himself up rather than the joke itself.  I got to watch the contrast as i

Tomorrow is a big big day for me both personally and professionally.  When I lay my head down tomorrow night, I will have undergone two huge processes. I plan to arrive to the center tomorrow morning bright and early before we open to ensure things are in order for our NAEYC assessor who will be there to conduct our site visit.  This is the technical culmination of our one-year process of reflection.  It's overwhelming and I am so glad this will be done before we go away for the weekend. Personally, I will have my HSG done tomorrow afternoon.  I need to be there by 3:30 so I plan to leave as soon as the NAEYC visit is complete.  I'm hoping that Dr. TK will be able to tell us what he's able to see during the procedure and that we won't be waiting for answers too long.  I'm hopeful. My stressors are colliding and it's put me on edge; it's also lead me to a new-found love for running.  Okay, jogging.  Maybe even just fast walking; it's hard to say.  I

My HSG has been rescheduled for Tuesday afternoon!  I'm excited for this because although it will be uncomfortable, it's my last stop on the train to answers.  Porch has to get some tests done this week on Friday and then we'll have given all we can give in the name of answers.  Then we head to Wisconsin to celebrate Oktoberfest with our friends in Lacrosse.  It's going to be a great week and we're looking forward to the sense of relief (hopefully) after all of our testing and the good times ahead. xoxo

Remember when I promised to stop Googling stuff?  Turns out I shouldn't have!  I got two confirmation calls yesterday for my appointments scheduled for today.  Blood work and ultrasound in the morning, HSG in the afternoon.  Yes.  Check.  Ready.  But then this nurse started talking about anesthesia and recovery and I was left feeling a touch confused about what she thought she was prepping me for... because this sounded pretty over the top for an HSG.  So when I got to the office this morning for my first appointment, I asked.  They looked at me like I was insane when I mentioned that I was told not to eat and that I would have anesthesia.  This prompted their check-in with the surgical center and wouldn't you know -- they were prepping me for the wrong surgery; they thought I was having two procedures done.  I spent a lot of time online last night researching HSG and am so thankful that I spoke up and tried to get more answers.  So no HSG for me today.  We're expecting to

Honestly, the last time I was this anxious about a cycle starting, it was my first cycle in middle school.  While laying in bed this morning, hitting snooze for the zillionth time, I just felt... bleh.  I knew what was comin' for me so I dragged myself out of bed and got ready for work.  I made the calls that I now find necessary:  the insurance company and the doctor's office.  I want everyone on the same page of the same book so that when the moment is here (like it now is), we're ready to move forward and we won't ever have to wait another 35 days to get to the next step.  It's my goal.  It's perhaps not realistic, but whatever, I'm clinging to it.  I think the lady at the insurance company felt bad for me.  Here's why:  "Oh Danielle, honey, you don't have to call for pre-authorization, that's the doctor's job."  Ma'am, with all due respect, I am not going to leave my fate in a stranger's hands and would rather check-in m

"Are you sure you can't drink?" "You're not pregnant yet." "Once you get pregnant, you can't drink for 9 months; better enjoy it now." And I thought that once the wedding was over, I'd be okay.  But then came Saturday afternoon.  And today was the Packer game.  I'm seriously in awe of how women are able to give up this part of their lifestyle.  I'm by no means in a need of a meeting, but I truly feel like drinking is just part of who we are; a good dark beer is synonymous with fall for me.  SERIOUSLY?!  Oktoberfest is the weekend of my 30th birthday and there's a fighting chance I won't be "allowed" to partake.  I'm trying instead to cut back.  But we'll see what my doctor says when I see him (hopefully this week!). I'm so excited for fall and all that it brings with it -- including those amazing dark beers but also decorating for the season.  Just placed a Scentsy order for some new yummy fall/wint

I'll admit it.  I'm a scaredy-cat.  I freak out when we go to the zoo and Porch wants to look at snakes and spiders and creepy-crawly yucky things.  I do okay when we go camping, my dad and grandpa taught me long ago not to be afraid of Daddy Long Legs and that they're good for us and whatever.  So I'm not the kid pluckin' the legs off of the Daddy Long Legs.  I survive the day to day life with spiders and such without screaming every time I see a spider.  Though I did (jokingly) get Porch to come kill a spider the other day that was roughly the size of this period (.). All joking aside please as I reveal to you the newest member of our household, Gustavo.  Never in my life have I been so damn paranoid about going out the back door or coming in at the end of the day.  He's this mythical spider that Porch and our friend saw one weekend while out back grilling and Porch told me about him and I was freaked just by a verbal description; I hadn't had the pleasu

We got back from the wedding (more on this in another post when there are some pictures to share) this afternoon & quickly changed into our game day attire and cued up the game on the tv.  We practically sprinted through the grocery store to get that out of the way and to ensure we were back on time for kickoff.  Man I have missed football.  The biggest challenge of living in Chicago as a Packers fan is limited access to the games; Comcast and I are in a fight right now and I refuse to give them any more money so I will not be adding the NFL package.  They can suck it.   Here's to the cookouts, the tailgating, the banter, and the season ahead. Cheers to all of our fellow football fans, but extra cheers to the Green Bay fans.   We love you more. PACK ATTACK!!! Go Pack Go!